


how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

by planetundersiege



Series: 100 Fandom Challenge [41]
Category: POV: You live in a society that was overthrown by woodchucks... (Short Film)
Genre: Angst, Bombs, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Dystopia, Gen, How did I ever get on woodchuck tiktok, I'm Sorry, POV Second Person, Rebellion, Revolution, Self-Sacrifice, TikTok, War, Woodchuck rebellion, Woodchucks, Wordcount: 100-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 06:33:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29978805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planetundersiege/pseuds/planetundersiege
Summary: You never wanted to join the human resistance.[Crack based on when I got on woodchuck tiktok]
Series: 100 Fandom Challenge [41]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1745629





	how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

You never wanted to join the human resistance. But as the human/woodchuck war quickly escalated it felt like you never really had a choice. If humanity would ever survive the resistance needed every member it could get, you included. You were barely out of your teens, young and scrawny and weak, an expendable soldier on the frontlines now plagued with horrible memories of screaming, dead bodies and chucked wood.

Each day the woodchucks took more ground, harming the humans while chucking all the wood they could, all while their battlecry could be heard in the distance. The mere thought of the sound sent shivers down your spine, having witnessed the cruelty first hand. You were the only living member of your family left, and you knew it would only get worse.

The woodchucks would not stop until they had total control of the world, eliminating all humans, or using them as slaves to help them chuck wood. You didn’t know which was worse, death or a lifetime of servitude under the woodchuck empire, forced to take the hourly woodchuck pledge and sing the woodchuck anthem to stay alive. The woodchucks on the top of the food chain.

You made up your mind, death would be a mercy. And with nothing left to live for, your childhood and previous life ruined, you gave the rest of your life to resistance, hoping you could make a change in your last moments. All to stop the woodchuck rebellion and save the human race. You would never get your innocence or family back, and the woodchucks would forever be cursed to you. They took away the life you could have had, all of your happiness just because they wanted to rule and dominate the world, while chucking wood. They were cold blooded beings, filthy  _ groundhogs _ . You knew they hated that slur and made sure to use it to their face every time you met a woodchuck in battle. If you died, you would die proud spitting in their face.

The last two weeks you have worked alone, the batteries on your radio had died days ago, leaving you completely cut off from the resistance and their bases surrounding the woodchuck capital. You had no idea if the stronghold had fallen or if they had succeeded in retaking the northern base of the city. Last you know, they had spies inside of the higher ranks of the woodchuck army, though betrayal was always a real possibility with the bribing of chucks.

War was ugly.

And even without the ability to contact the resistance for backup you refused to turn back, you had a mission to do. And that was blowing up the western woodchuck storage facility with their wood provisions. Without wood to chuck, the woodchucks would be weakened and a large-scale attack from humanity would be imminent. You would succeed, or die trying. The revolution would be in full bloom, fighting for rights against the tyrannical rule of the woodchucks.

It was now or never.

You had infiltrated the facility and had planted the bombs, but been spotted in the process as you tried to head out. At first you didn’t notice, but then you heard the sound that made you let out a bloodcurdling scream of despair as your mind told you to give up and fall into a fetal position, awaiting your end as you thought about your family.

_ How much wood would a woodchuck chuck of a woodchuck could chuck wood? Woodchuck could chuck wood, woodchuck could chuck wood. _

There was no use, this was the end for you. They were merciless, you were going to die. Just another casualty in the war. There was no way you could get out, you were locked in and you heard their battle cry over and over, coming closer. There was clawing on the other side of the door that would break any second now.

Goodbye cruel world… no. You were a soldier. Your days might be numbered and you knew you would die here. But your sacrifice would not be in vain, the facility needed to be destroyed. The woodchucks would lose their supplies and the tides of the war might turn.

You had nothing left to live for, so you would make the ultimate sacrifice. If you were going down, the woodchucks would go down with you.

_ How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Woodchuck could chuck wood, woodchuck could chuck wood. _

The door creaked as it was blown in, in front of you were countless woodchuck soldiers, bloodthirsty and ready to take you down. They would never get the chance.

“Fuck you, stupid groundhogs.”

All hail the resistance.

You pressed the detonator.


End file.
